Sam heuston dating
Then came the news I had been waiting for: "You have been picked to be a Big Brother housemate." My stomach flipped and I stifled a scream, especially as she then warned me I was forbidden from telling anyone."Start thinking of excuses to tell your friends," I was told.
If I'm honest, I feel that same lurching realisation in the pit of my stomach now whenever I walk out of my house.
Within hours, I had been admitted to St Luke's Psychiatric Hospital in Huddersfield.
I was there for two days, under 24-hour suicide watch, dosed up on Diazepam to help me rest.
Within minutes of arriving, I'd been picked out of thousands of hopefuls and whisked to the front of the queue by a production assistant.
'I determined to get noticed'I was so determined to get noticed that I was putting on an act, making out I was extra loud and super-confident.
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Now, of course, I can see I was setting myself up for a spectacular fall by casting myself as a brash loudmouth. I had been sucked in by the psychological games played by the production team. But that night, just after arriving back at our house, my mobile rang and they asked me to turn straight back to Newcastle.